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Death in Sedona +365 Days of James Arthur Ray

As mentioned here numerous times, James Scott Shore was a very dear friend of mine - a brother really. James died at the hands of one James Arthur Ray (aka. DeathRay)

the measure of the man

When I reflect on his absence, I still become mad. I still become sad. And I still have to subjugate the impulses that roil in my soul.

Truth be told, I cannot spend much time thinking on James' death. Or the manner in which he died. Or how seemingly senseless it was for him to die in the manner in which he did - without becoming very angry and wanting to exact payment for his stolen life. Likewise, I try to avoid thinking less selfishly - that is, I try to avoid thinking on the impact it has had on James' family - his widow, his children, his mom, sister, brother, etc. Because when I do think about what it means and what it will mean forever into the future, I begin to shift from light to darkness. And it becomes near impossible not to fantasize about exacting payment in full.

It is decidedly a good thing that I am a Christian. Because I cannot say with absolute certainty that were I an atheist I would not feel obligated to balance the scales. In the absence of a Divine Debt Collector, I might actually feel it was my place to reconcile the books.

I will not lie: I am not entirely easy to manage. I am as nasty as I am kind. Dan would understand this, given that he is also so-inclined. He has much better control of his darker side as it relates to revenge, however. A much gentler general disposition is he - yet, I can tell you that there is a very deep proclivity toward Justice and seeing Justice satisfied that must be genetic (so difficult to override it is). Almost mechanical and outside of the purview of reason it is.

To give you an example, I am shaking as I write this piece. I mean physically shaking. And I know what that is. I know why my body quakes. And it is scary. A younger me would not have had the wherewithal to contain the core.

This year has been brutal. And the only manner in which I have been able to plow through is on the one hand to think on how little my suffering is compared to James' children and wife - and on the other to recognize that I have a mission to see to... namely, serving his family and proving pridefully James' vision for this business had merit.

I don't understand these things any more today than a year ago.

But this anniversary does warrant a big fat loud "Fuck You" to James Arthur Ray. Well and truly, "Fuck You, James Arthur Ray. Charlatan, scam artist and mal-educated hack".

Enoch_Root

AKA. Bobby Donn Brubaker (the most popular man in Mesa, AZ), the Umbrella of Terror, Jack Ketch.

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